LovabLe Neurotic

this space is my own... the world through my eyes

Friday, August 11, 2006

my inner sanctum

Remember when you were a child? Remember the hours spent watching or reading fairy tales? Or children's tales meant to teach you life lessons while you were glued to the set/book when you were just a mere 10 yrs old?

They thought you to be polite, loving, caring, determined, kind, and most of all to be honest.

Do you remember The Secret Garden?

A little girl finds a dilapidated garden, and is determined to bring it back to its splendid state. The more she lingers in the garden, the more secrets she uncovers. Not only does she 'refurbish' the garden, she manages to help her cousin to walk again, and re-bond the cousin and his father.

don't you have a secret garden?

i know i do. where no one can touch me. My inner sanctum. Somewhere i feel safe, and protected. A garden where i can keep my deepest darkest secrets, and holds the love and life essence of me.

Somewhere, along the way i locked the door to my garden and lost the key.

In the movie, the little girl brought the garden back to life. I am still waiting for someone to bring me back to life again. Breathe life into me, and help me understand and embrace Love. I need someone in my life to take care of me, and nurture me back to my old self.

This book talks about children and their need for tender loving care if they are to flourish. Perhaps, as it turns out, that these children's tales were meant for US? Adults. How in the absence of love, and care, one can turn to stone. Or like the poor crippled cousin.. we are pushed aside and tucked away in the corner, without love, and eventually will (with time) shrivel up and die.

Like the garden, I wait. Patiently for the day when someone will find the key and open the door. I do not promise that it willbe a pretty sight. I do not promise that it will be beautiful. I can not promise that all sorts of weeds won't be growing in there.

but with your love, light, water and care, I can grow. I will grow into a beautiful spring bloom.

I'm still waiting for you.

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